Toxic self-talk habits that prevent sales success
In my last blog, I explained that your sales performance will always be undermined by distractions:
Sales Performance = Sales Talent + Knowledge + Experience – DISTRACTIONS
These “distractions” are the unconscious, insidious causes of underperformance and loss of confidence. Regardless of your talent, skill set, knowledge and experience, these distractions will always undermine your performance.
Much research in the past 20 years has uncovered specific destructive self-talk patterns that lead to career underachievement.
It all started with the work of Psychologist Aaron T. Beck in the 1960s, writing about distorted thinking patterns, and has most recently been modified by Dr. David Burns.
The first step in changing these self-destructive conversations you have with yourself is to recognize which of your self-talk patterns are toxic. Once you identify those habits, the next step is to challenge and modify them, which I will cover in the next article. The good news is that with practice, you can learn to recognize these habits and modify them forever!
Toxic Self-Talk Habits that Prevent Sales Success
- Toxic Self-Talk Habit #1: All-or-Nothing Thinking
In this example of toxic self-talk, you view your world as strictly blackor white, good or bad. Such thinking involves attempting to always be perfect, which is obviously impossible. You inwardly describe something you don’t do perfectly as a failure.
Example: You have an unproductive week prospecting for new clients and you tell yourself, “This week proves that I am a failure when it comes to generating new business.”
- Toxic Self-Talk Habit #2: Overgeneralization
Overgeneralization occurs when you exaggerate an unfortunate situation and you believe that is the beginning of a never-ending pattern of repeat episodes. The tip-off to this kind of thinking is the frequent use of words such as “never, always, all, every, none, etc…” These absolutes are exaggerations of reality and using them in your self-talk is extremely self-defeating.
Example:A producer has difficulty asserting himself with a very aggressive client and concludes that “I will always have trouble asserting myself with difficult clients and I’ll never be able to correct this flaw that I have.”
- Toxic Self-Talk Habit #3: Jumping to Conclusions (Catastrophising)
The tip off to this pattern of self-talk is the constant use of “what ifs.” You take a situation or event and blow it out of proportion by assuming that a disastrous outcome is on its way. You come to expect a catastrophic conclusion, as if you have a crystal ball into the future and (of course) you usually expect a negative outcome.
Example: “What if I can’t build my book of business as quickly as my colleagues? My boss will be very disappointed in me, I’ll have to quit this job and look for another career.”
Next page: Toxic Self-Talk Habits 4 & 5
• Thoughts or comments on this article? Please visit this thread focused on Dr. Jack’s series of articles: Battling Your Own Internal Critic
More from Dr. Jack Singer:
- Political reaction: Republicans propose The American Health Care Act
- State Farm reports $1.2 billion pre-tax operating loss in 2016
- DOL aims for initial 60-day delay in fiduciary rule effective date
- Report aims to put a stop to ‘Use It and Lose It’ homeowner policies
- Most LTCI claims begin and end at home; insurers pay out $8.65 billion in 2016 claims, new data confirms
- Record-setting fixed, FIA sales in 2016 can’t keep overall annuity sales from 6% decline
- 2nd annual ‘Insurance Careers Month’ trumpets fact 93% are proud to work in the industry; rallies recruiting efforts
- MetLife annuity and life products officially rebranded under Brighthouse Financial name